A MILLION IS ALL ITS GONNA TAKE
Assalamualaikum and Hi,
Its been so long since I posted last entry. Hmm,
Topic today, I don't know, its just being mental breakdown.
I'm too tired keeping whats inside in me that I barely cannot say. I always keep blaming myself for everything. I didn't even have right to speak on my behalf. I always said it was my fault eventhough it wasn't my fault. I'm so sorry if I'm always keep sharing my problem on my blogs. This is the only way I can keep confessing my problems here. I don't want the world to know whats inside in me that I want to tell the world. Its just I want them to know how I feel. feeling lonely inside. Seems like I'm being homesick, Its almost 3 weeks I miss ma family. Only 3 weeks. I don't know, maybe family is the place where I heal my pain. The love, The missingness?? lol, I'm joking. Maybe I need someone who are here beside me, Holding my hand, together get through all this messy deepsy problem. Don't want to pull away but searching for the solver to solve my problems. I'm seriously f*** up right now. FML! I'm sorry I'd curse on my blog. So sorry. I know that Allah always be here beside me. I know I'm strong. Just cover your face, be happy as I always in front of people. Protect the lies that I'm sad, I'm unhappy. Exposing that I'm the only person who happy go lucky. Always smile if I'd have problems. The truth is I am not. Its my fault anyway, maybe this is one of punishment that Allah gave to me. Testing me, I'm a strong servant. I can handle it by myself. I can get up by my own feet. I can barely walk and run. I can open my eyes to see what will coming next. So, yahhh. I can do this. eventhough it hurts, but I really don't want to get into it. It may harm myself. So, thats all for today. Always keep loving yourself. Always remember Him. He always there with you. So keep yourself stronger. Okay? In Shaa Allah. Assalamualaikum 💖💗💗
Its been so long since I posted last entry. Hmm,
Topic today, I don't know, its just being mental breakdown.
I'm too tired keeping whats inside in me that I barely cannot say. I always keep blaming myself for everything. I didn't even have right to speak on my behalf. I always said it was my fault eventhough it wasn't my fault. I'm so sorry if I'm always keep sharing my problem on my blogs. This is the only way I can keep confessing my problems here. I don't want the world to know whats inside in me that I want to tell the world. Its just I want them to know how I feel. feeling lonely inside. Seems like I'm being homesick, Its almost 3 weeks I miss ma family. Only 3 weeks. I don't know, maybe family is the place where I heal my pain. The love, The missingness?? lol, I'm joking. Maybe I need someone who are here beside me, Holding my hand, together get through all this messy deepsy problem. Don't want to pull away but searching for the solver to solve my problems. I'm seriously f*** up right now. FML! I'm sorry I'd curse on my blog. So sorry. I know that Allah always be here beside me. I know I'm strong. Just cover your face, be happy as I always in front of people. Protect the lies that I'm sad, I'm unhappy. Exposing that I'm the only person who happy go lucky. Always smile if I'd have problems. The truth is I am not. Its my fault anyway, maybe this is one of punishment that Allah gave to me. Testing me, I'm a strong servant. I can handle it by myself. I can get up by my own feet. I can barely walk and run. I can open my eyes to see what will coming next. So, yahhh. I can do this. eventhough it hurts, but I really don't want to get into it. It may harm myself. So, thats all for today. Always keep loving yourself. Always remember Him. He always there with you. So keep yourself stronger. Okay? In Shaa Allah. Assalamualaikum 💖💗💗
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